[Personal Post]: Life Changes In A Heartbeat

Two Monday’s ago (April 27th) started off as any other Monday. I had taken the day off as a mental health day and purchased a new audiobook to listen to while I went on a daily walk. But 3 miles in, something happened that shook me to the core.

Heartbeat article

For those of you who are new to my site or have just been introduced through social media, there’s something you should know about me. I have a defibrillator implanted in my chest due to a heart condition I’m working on correcting. I had 7 surgeries and all have failed but that never stopped me from living a normal life.

Well, 3 miles into my hike, I had figured out the answer to a burning question I have had for weeks. In that same moment, I took a “selfie” to exclaim a beginning of a new movement that I was going to start.

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Literally 2 minutes afterwards, my heart had sped up into a rhythm that was incredibly dangerous. My defibrillator had shocked me (luckily once), but I had to get a ride home for the day and just relax.

Unfortunately, this isn’t where the story ends. It shook me up but I was able to fight through any negative feelings I had about the situation.

Fast forward to Friday I was out checking in on a few clients (surprise visits) and had parked 4 blocks away from the main strip. After hanging out there all morning, I decided to head back to get some reading. By the time I reached block 4, my heart raced again.

I was certain I was going to get shocked again and I panic’d so I just laid down in the parking lot where my car was but off to the side so I wouldn’t get ran over. My heart wouldn’t go back to a normal rhythm but it wasn’t going fast enough to get shocked (luckily).

The paramedics came and I ended up in the hospital. After an incredibly terrifying 3 hours in the hospital, I was released with additional medication to keep my heart rate down.

The challenge was I was simply walking when this dangerous rhythm happened. All weekend long, I was terrified to simply walk. Every extra beat or skipped beat terrified me.

[Getting shocked by a defibrillator feels like getting kicked in the chest by a horse AND the past times I’ve been shocked, I ended up getting shocked anywhere from 15-25 times so that’s why I was terrified of getting shocked.]

Life can change in an instant. One minute you’re living a true moment of happiness and the next, something happens that can change your life forever.

Luckily, what had happened to me wasn’t a life or death situation. It very much could have been but I have a bionic guardian that keeps me kicking every single day.

When Will You Decide To Live?

Something that I have learned from all of this adversity is that the majority of people don’t actually live, they merely exist. That makes my heart ache because we only have one life and it’s meant to be lived.

I’ve read books that have said “don’t focus on the negative, focus on the positives and the negatives will disappear” but that can’t be further from the truth.

The truth is that life is a series of experiences that you’re supposed to live. The perceived negative experiences aren’t actually negative, they are positive lessons flowing through you for which you perceive to be negative.

My situation wasn’t a negative situation even though living in the experience, it feels negative. It feels terrifying. I have fallen to my knees and have screamed/cried until I feel asleep. But the experience I went through is a blessing. It was a reminder that I need to live, not just exist.

Don’t be afraid to rock the boat. Don’t be afraid to go against societal norms if it isn’t right for you. Don’t be afraid of rejection from your peers, that simply means you need to find new ones that accept you for you. Lastly, don’t be afraid to live your best life.

You owe it to yourself to amplify your life to levels that are scary to you in all areas. You will have people criticize you for it but you will also have people praise you for it. This moment, right now, is all that you really have. Anything else is just a guessing game.

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Don’t be afraid, no matter how terrifying it feels. I’m right there with you. That’s why I’m starting the movement to amplify your life and live. 

What will you do with your next heartbeat?

Comment below and tell me how you’re going to amplify your life in the next month in any area of your life – health, fitness, relationships, career, finances, and personal.